I should say first off that I’m not feeling this one at all. The shipping delay really irked me – the box shipped August 28 and took 15 days to arrive. Newgistics, you suck. This was the first time Goodebox used Newgistics for shipping, but after having heard about all the issues Birchbox subscribers have with Newgistics, I’m not surprised it didn’t go well, by no fault of GoodeBox. That said, if the box was better, I might not be on the fence about cancelling, but the box isn’t all that great for me. I mean.. a wee tin of sea salt?! Really?! The full-size nail polish is fun, but the color isn’t really me – it’s sort of a glittery beige and just looks weird. I saw other people got boxes with a pretty aqua blue color, so I was really disappoited to see muddy glitter in mine. The blush color is all wrong (way too yellow), I already have a soap vendor I LOVE to bits, and the Barre 3 stuff just isn’t me. Free trial, so I’ll still give it a go, but eh. Their website has photos of only svelte, toned women, and there are no gals who look like me in any of their videos. While I’m sure they offer modified poses, it’s nice to see folks of all sizes on fitness videos instead of Mr. and Ms. Perfect. It’s disappointing and makes me want to hide my voluptuous ass in baggy sweatpants instead of working out with three perfectly toned people. I’ll admit that the shipping delay made my review of this box tainted with a big old pair of grumpy pants, so, it’s a little more critical than usual. Anyway, on to the box!
- Square Hue Nail Polish – three .5oz bottles per month/$14.99 – The color I received is, “Rodeo Drive,” and it’s just not me. It’s a really peculiar color that looks kinda pinkish or brownish depending on the light and, ugh. I hate pink. Hate hate hate pink. This is never a color I would’ve picked out on my own, but the formula covers really well in two coats, goes on nicely and is 5-free. WAY better than Zoya, IMHO, in terms of coverage and smell. Zoya takes sometimes 3 or 4 coats to cover and really stinks for being a 5-free polish. I don’t think I’ll subscribe to the monthly box, but I do like the polish and may do a one-time order. It’s just a gamble with mystery colors, and if there’s any pink in the box that month, I’m going to be wildly disappointed, and there’s no way to specify color choices. Not good.
Update: I like the coverage and it seemed to last about a week, but I hated the color more and more every day. - Weleda Skin Food – 2.5 oz/$19 – So, it’s a really expensive skin lotion, and the samples are silly foil packets. I don’t like foil packets – you have to use the entire amount in the packet in one use and can’t save it if it’s too much. Drives me crazy. I’ll use the samples, but for skin lotion? There are more affordable alternatives that are just as good.
Update: I finally tried this and it REEKS. There’s something about the scent that really turns me off.. I can’t put my finger on what it smells like, but it almost smells like some kind of industrial citrus cleaning product, and in a bad way. Note to self, use only on feet and legs. - Homespun Northwest Himalayan Citrus Head-to-toe Cleansing Bar – 5oz/$13 – Soap. A bar of soap for $13. I have a favorite Honey Ale and Egg solid soap I use for shampoo that I buy from Sweets N Things on Etsy for $6 for 4oz. I have no plans to switch since I LOVE that soap already, and it’s affordable and lasts me about 4 months. This sample though is for a bar of soap for $13 that doesn’t contain unicorn hair or fairy farts. Nope. It also immediately shed salt that was sprinkled on the bar all over the place. The product card offers a discount of 20% off $10 or more, but I’m really not interested.
- Plantlife Arnica Relief Gel – 4oz/$15.90 – I’ve never felt that Arnica gel actually did anything for me. I’ve tried it before on bruises and noticed no difference in healing time or pain relief. So, this is really meh for me and not something I’d ever buy (and will likely be found months from now in the medicine cabinet, still unused). There’s a coupon code for 25% off an order through their website, so I’ll have to see what else they make.
- All Natural Face Matte Cream Blushes for Lips & Cheeks – .7oz/$5.75 – Reasonably priced, but the color of the sample I received is all wrong for my skin. It’s, “Dark Rose,” when I’m more of a “Peachy Rose” or “Persimmon.” It’s just too yellow and isn’t a color I can use as blush, and definitely isn’t a color I’d ever use on my lips. The formula is nice though and I like that it can be used two ways. There’s a 20% off coupon, in case I want to try one of the other shades.
- Jacobsen Pure Flake Sea Salt – 1.5oz/$9.95 – It’s salt. I don’t understand why this is in the GoodeBox at all other than that they, “procure pure salt crystals straight from the cold waters of the Oregon Coast using traditional, hand harvesting methods,” so that they can call it froufrou special salt and charge more. Big deal. It’s still salt. And going out to dinner anywhere involves over-salted food (everyone uses way too much for our near-sodium-free home cooking), so why the wee little travel tin? It’s all weird, and it’s just salt.
Update: Put it on dinner last night, and yep, salt. Nothing special about the flavor. It’s just salt. - Barre 3 – $15/month – The offer in the box came with a wristband, Field Guide, and a month of free online classes. I’ve done yoga and pilates before, even went to 6 months of sessions with a personal trainer. I’m no stranger to fitness, but I absolutely hate when programs like this show only svelte, toned people in their website photos. Okay, fine, image sells, but showing me that people of all sizes take their classes is much more encouraging than making me feel like I’m not the kind of person they want in their classes. I mean, free trial, so as long as I don’t have to enter a credit card, I’ll give it a try.
I’m pretty bummed about not getting the tea – I would’ve definitely used that up. I’m not sure how else to adjust my preferences on GoodeBox’s website to get better colors that work for my skin – this is a second or third time I ended up with colors that don’t work for me. I keep going back and making sure I selected the right things, but it doesn’t seem to matter much. Anyway, sorry for the downer of a review, but this month is hugely disappointing. I’ll probably end up giving the nail polish to a friend and see if anyone else is interested in the cream blush. After that I have salt, a teeny chunk of soap, and foil packets of skin lotion. Yeah. Not so good. I’ll give GoodeBox another month to see if things turn around (Subscription boxes can be so hit or miss, so I like to give them another chance), but with Newgistics on board, this doesn’t bode well.